Toronto summer, where art thou? I was just about to step outside in what the Weather Network promised was 20 degree weather when it started pouring. Not refreshing spring showers either, but full on Asia-style it's raining freaking fat cats and obese dogs pouring. Suffice to say I'm indoors instead nestled between a cozy blanket, my darling little blog and a mug of green tea. Patio season will just have to wait.
I've been situated in front of my laptop for most of the day now doing what I feel like I've been doing for the past lifetime -- looking for a job. Modeling and dabbling in promotions for nightlife in the city has been enough to keep my afloat since my return from Singapore, but let's be honest; neither is a steady nor very fulfilling industry and at 23 (and turning 24 in less than a month with horror slowly sinking in) I feel like, and have been feeling for a while now, that there is something more for me that is hopefully financially sustainable as well.
Equipped with a double major in Urban Geography from what I think is the best school in Canada (U of T repping!) hasn't been as reassuring as one might think...I realized not too long after graduation that a life of soil samples and demographic statistics wasn't one I was, or ever would be, passionate about. The idea of being chained to the helm of an office desk working nine to five and clocking in and out literally makes me uncomfortable and modeling and nightlife just isn't intellectually stimulating enough for me. So where to start?
I feel like I've written more than a few blog posts about being twenty-something, dazed, confused, yet somehow unrelentingly motivated to be doing....something. And, the truth is, I'm still stuck in that in-between gray area of being young enough to not freak out, yet old enough to start feeling a little purposeless. Case and point? I woke up the other day and my to-do list consisted of doing laundry and picking up a check. Yup. Those two things and that was it. A little purposeless may of been the nice way of putting it; I felt about as useful as a used stamp.
I am strangely optimistic though (as I charmingly find most others I know in similar situations) and probably a tad overly confident in my skills, whatever they are (Being uber-social? Constant blogger? Active social networker? Pretty when dolled-up? More valuable than you may think!) when it comes to the job-hunt. For now, I'm applying to temporary office jobs (partially to feel useful, partially because I want a new purse and it will need to be Balenciaga) while still searching for....well whatever it seems all twenty-somethings are searching for. The perfect job, that allows me to be creative, travel, be paid well and contribute to this world in a big way. Sounds ridiculous? Maybe. But the more I focus on it, the more I know that eventually, in time, it will manifest itself.
Call it the curse of the twenty-something; we're naively optimistic, blatantly confident and have blind faith in a perfect something-or-the-other that's bound to happen. I wouldn't have it any other way.
x
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